a big goal to cross off my list and a dream come true

friends, please come share this very special and important night with me!
i know i am a bad blogger, but i hope you will think i am a better creator

i hope this find you well and i hope to see you at the show!
with love, pure childhood excitement and real grown up nerves...
t

echo...echo...echoooooo

is there anyone out there?

my lord it has been a minute!
my last post was on march 21. and i talked about lacking motivation...ya think?

okay, so it is june 2.
here is what you have missed and or been a part of
i was alllllll diet last time we talked.
i was going to reread the mayo clinic diet, i was going to educate myself and rededicate myself to my pursuit of healthiness.
i didn't reread the mayo clinic book.
in fact, i think all that i read since then is a chealsea handler book for book club.

but i did join weight watchers. april 25.
like full blown go to meetings weight watchers. people are more successful if they attend the meetings and i must be successful. i want to be a healthy person!
i can't fail two diets in one year.
EXCUSE ME! did i say two diets? one diet, one lifestyle change. hehe.

i am currently down 6.6 pounds and things are going well.
i am stil doing couch 2 5k. i know it is a 9 week program, but it has been more for me. i finally did my first 25 minute run last weekend and it felt great!

my goal for this month is 45 minutes of (at least) moderate activity a day. every day.
two days in and i am kicking ass.

lots of other things have happened in the last few months.
bacon finally found a home, which involved a last minute weekend road trip to indianapolis with sarah.which was awesome. perhaps i will tell you all about the vet situation, but i am not ready to relive it yet and i also haven't decided how i feel about it. anyway, it was great to get to catch up. that is the most time that we had spent together since high school, so it was great that somewhere, someway, somethings will always just be a certain way.

this is the first time in since i was 20 that i don't have a pet of my very own. of course, there is luna. (who got a puppy cut and is stupid cute)

we have been camping for the first time this season and also made it down to the lake all ready.
i got up on the wake board every try.
this felt good.
once i was up i would start to think about what i need to do next.
and then i would eat shit.
wake boarding. wake surfing. still both things that i never thought i would be into, but really enjoy.
i also got to tube. i am tubing a badass.

i dyed my hair blonde. twice.
i got a promotion at work.
i turned twenty eight.
i officially moved in with bryce.
and i will be showing my artshits at hairpins (an adorable salon owned by a fabulous friend) in late fall.

i am loving looking at all these blogs and gathering inspiration.
this weekend i hope to get the rest of my things gone through. unpacked. repacked or relocated. then i hope to be able to set up a little space in the guest room to let the inspiration flow.
i also need to hit up some garage sales/antique malls/thrift stores and/or see if anyone has old wood, windows, whatever.

if you do hit me up.

i hope to share my progress.

i am also thinking about starting a new blog.

and planting this seed in the back of my mind

we are almost half way through this year all ready.
i can hardly believe it.
i hope life has been kind to you...

here are a few things that are making me drool

can a bitch get some motivation?

what is going on with me!?
i still have the eye on the prize, but can't seem to get myself to play by the rules and make smart decisions.
i think i need to reread the diet book, pick up "in defense of food" and really get motivated again.
the eight inches of snow aren't helping.
i am doing pretty well on exercising. it is the making smart decisions part that i could get better at.
i got down to 166 and then the scale went back up to 170 and has stayed right around there for a week now.
i need to take my measurements. if i have shown some progress there then it will probably motivate me to want to continue to improve. but if i show no progress, what will that do to the motivation?
i am such a pussy.
after this message i am going to make some breakfast, sit down with some cookbooks and the mayo clinic journal and plan a week worth of meals. (except wednesday...that is opera night)
having a plan and sticking to it is a habit i need to form.
i also need to make it to the gym today to finish w1d3 of couchto5k.
i tired to be flexible in my gym schedule last week and it just didn't work out well. i still made it monday night for bodyweights and the first c25k. tuesday beans and i met in the morning and lifted and did some floor work.
wednesday we met in the morning with our trainer and then did c25k after work. then thursday i didn't get up before work and go to the gym, when i knew i wouldn't be working out Thursday night. friday i was going to meet jill in the mornin, but then decided i would go after work. and then i just never went.
i did go out to dinner and drank a lot of wine and a lot of gin and a lot of tequila. i haven't been drunk in a while and it was fun. we had a living room dance party and i tried to work my abs as much as possible.

i am not kidding.

side note...i don't recommend the farmhouse.

yesterday we got up, i ate biscuits and gravy. then slept for 3 hours. took a shower. went to a mary kay party (don't be jealous), drank beer and ate cheese fries and pizza watching KU choke. and then i did nothing all night.
see where things went wrong?
the only plants i ate yesterday were strawberries, grapes, tomatoes on cheese fries and canned mushrooms that i mostly picked off of my pizza.
and the only exercise i got was walking up 3 flights of stairs to get to momilla's.
*sigh* i am going to try and take measurements today.

sincerely,
snowinginspring, kck

i hate running. probably because i am not good at it.

when i played soccer we used to have to run between 5 and 9 miles almost every practice....in the hot and in the cold and through all kinds of strains, sprains and high school hangovers...

and i hated it.
with all my being.

i played with a lot of girls who were runners. who loved running. and who still love running.

and were good at it.

i was bad at it.

so i hated it even more, naturally

(read: i have a hard time doing things that i don't know that i will be good at. it is an issue, but i am getting better)

and i decided to hate running forever.

but recently bryce and i were talking about running 5ks and i realized that i think it would be a cool accomplishment.

and i thought about couch-to-5k 

the idea really intrugies me.

and it is an accomplishable goal.

i think at some point i will do it.

with that being said...my knee is not cooperating.

it was hurting pretty bad for a while and then i stopped doing zumba about a month ago...and started doing pilates and yoga with training and body weights. 

then, when i started doing two hours at the gym, i started doing cardio again. 

and i was really enjoying it.
my knee hurt a little,.sometimes. but not like it was before.
saturday i did pilates at 9am. then lifted for about 25 minutes. and did 45 minutes of cardio.
sunday i didn't make it to the gym.
monday i went to a class that is an hour long, alternating 10 min or cardio with 10 minutes of "toning"...like hand weights and leg lifts. then did 45 min of the elliptical and then 15 minutes of stretching.
last night i did the elliptical for 40 minutes, walked for about 15
and then beans and i worked out with our trainer.
my knee was a little achy before. and after.
tonight i went and walked for about twenty minutes and then went to do
a weights class and had to leave.
i left twenty minutes into class and went and bought a knee brace (that i should have done a while ago) and then cried about it.
it is really frustrating. i feel that same shitty feeling i did when i hurt my foot last january.

i am going to wear the brace to work out  in. continue taking aleve as the doctor suggested and hope that it stops being sore. 

but i think that i am going to need to go back and probably get an mri to see what the problem is. 

i can feel and hear that something isn't right.
i am just not ready to be able to work out.if something is wrong. 

it is the way to make calories go away. if i am eating a little worse i can make up for it on the elliptical.
so maybe my knee shitting out on me will be a nice way to learn to get my diet reigned in.

blah.

stuck at 168. but still have lots of drive. 

the first weekend in march i am doing to go a two day cleanse and then back to the "lost ie" phase of the diet for two weeks. 

the beginning of april i go to nyc for liz's 30th. and i would like to be in the low 160s by then.

i hope things are good for you. 

one month until the spring equinox...

mmm. i can't wait!

mirror, mirror

i used to have a lot of pictures of myself. a lot of them i took myself.
days like today, slightly bright and completely cloudy used to be my favorite.
i haven't taken pictures in a lot time.
i finally want to again.

lifechange freeish

i just discovered that i have a have fallen in love with year long blogs.
i fell in love with the idea of 3191 a year of mornings after reading a recommendation in real simple.
i freaking love real simple.
it is about two friends, who are 3191 miles apart
one in portland, maine and one in portland, orgeon...
who each take a picutre every morning and post it to each other as a blog.
which then became a book.

i love this idea.

i couldn't help but think of liz and wish that we had something like it. 

(liz read: sorry i just ruined your christmas present. i will hand deliver it in april. promise)

i recently watched julie and julia  recently and really enjoyed it.
and really wished that i would have read the book first.
and the blog  too.

i have looked at weight-loss blogs that people post on daily.

i love when people do 365 days on flickr.

today gretch sent me a link to dust breeding.
this guy is making a thing everyday for 365 days (or more).
paintings and drawings and songs and videos and crafts.
thank you gretchy.
it is really great.

as soon as i read her description and saw his work i thought:

i want to do a 365.

but what a big undertaking!
you can't just say that you will do something for the next 365 days and then not follow through.
i haven't even gone 365 days straight with brushing my teeth in my life!
the only things that i can guarantee that i do daily are things i must do so i don't die.
you know...blinking, breathing.going to the ladies...all that jazz.

that is a lot of pressure.
i would hate to let you down.
what would i pick?
how insane will it make the b man?
this is something i am going to think about for a while.
maybe once i am looking for a new challenge i will look back to this
until then, any suggestions?

off to tally up the calories...

get ur eagle on.

i am starting to get my confidence back.
i met up with gretch on friday after work.
she had a shit day.
we went to happy hour. i drank three tequila/soda/lime-s. and ate half of a philly (no side).
we extended happy hour to another bar for some other type of tequila drink. got in an argument with a guy who hosts parties to promote a med spa in joco (think: forty two, flamboyant and pumped full of botox...did i mention drunk and obnixious?)
we were having too much fun.
gretch even told jokes!
i decided this kind of night it worthy of a hangover and we agreed to make this a late night situation
around 10 we went to gusto.
had a gin and tonic while we listened to some smooooooth old 45s and then decided to go upstairs and check out the dj.
gretch got me some lovely stawberry, booze, cilantro combination.
and then we started dancing.
this was around 10:45. 
at 2:00 in the morning i walked off the dance floor, drenched in sweat, with my feet killing me.

that was one of the best workouts i have had in a long time.
and my feet are still sore, my abs hurt, my legs ache, and my shoulders feel thoroughly worked.
it was a 3 hour, full body workout.
i look forward to doing in all over again, minus the hangover.

i hadn't had that kind of fun in a long time.
i hadn't felt good enough about myself to get out there and dance for a while.
i hadn't really wanted to go out a lot, because i wasn't happy with the way i looked.
i don't like the way my clothes have been fitting.
i hate trying on everything in my closet and picking the one that touches me the least. i am not ashamed of myself, i just know that i am not at my best.
but that have the ability to change that.
yesterday i put on some jeans that i got for christmas.
when my mom gave them to me they did not fit.
i could button them, but they weren't comfortable.
and gave me a pretty rockin muffin top.
yesterday i put them on.
they fit!
it is those "fuck yes" moments that i try to turn to when faced with making the healthy choice.
it doesn't always work, but most of the time it does the job.
this week was a god week for me.
monday jill and i did pilates...bryce and i can't remember what we ate on monday ( i have been really bad about keeping logs), but it was vegetables of some sort.
tuesday i walked before we did training and then holly came over after. we ate spianch, tomato, mozz and olive oil on flat out bread.
wednesday night i just came home from work and gretch came over and we had the quiona stuffed bell peppers.
super good vegan dish.
thursday morning jill and i worked out early.
i fell out of the morning workouts in the late fall and so it was nice to be reminded of how much i liked it.even if i could just get up early to start my day stress free.
i took my waist measurement that morning and i am down a little over and inch.
this feels great! i am also finally out of the 170s.
that night the the point  reopened!
they did a wonderful job with the remodel and it was great to see so many old friends.
friday i did yoga at work at lunch.
and the dance party that night.
saturday i was a little hungover, but still got up early for a tour of the roasterie  and brunch with some lovely ladies.
we went to chez elle in the westide.
i had had a gruyere, mushroom and spinach crepe with a fruit smoothie (just frozen fruit and apple juice) .
last night we hung out with kel and tommy at larry and renee's.
i watched my first ku game of the season and throughly enjoyed it.
dinner was tasty AND healthy and i had three glasses of wine.
we got home a little after midnight.
got up this morning at a decent hour and without hangover.
i ate all right.
i got some new workout clothes (marshalls. so cheap)
and the highlight of my day- jill and i went to an hour and a half yoga class and then to see lovely bones.
then the store, dinner and this here blog.

i really enjoyed the yoga. a lot. there is another yoga class with the same instructor on wednesdays.
i hope to attend. and hope bryce will come with.
this week will be the second week of pilates. i am looking forward to it.

oh, and we are officially able to eat out
i didn't make it all month, but it was only a few times-so i am not upset about it.
the new goal is to only eat out once a week. so if one of us burns it on a lunch, we aren't able to go out to dinner together.
i will be interested to see how this pans out :) i think it will make going out seem like more of a special occasion. and not a regular option for food. so it won't get in the way of my health goals or the money saving.


i has almost been one month since i started this diet.
day 1 was january 4.
this thursday will be a month.
sounds like a good time for a recap...
until then-i hope you are well.