10.06.2008

date.dot.dork

so dating...
dating is funny to me and to be honest, a totally new concept.
i have met most of the people i have been in relationships with through friends.
people i meet, get to know and then do everything i can to make them like me.
sometimes it works, usually it doesn't. either way, it rarely involved dinner and drinks that i was not expected or allowed to pay for.

lately i have been test driving the world of internet dating.
date.dork is an interesting place for me. i feel like i am interviewing for a job that i have no idea what the requirements are and that i am not really sure that i want.
things the confuse/intrigue/weird me out about date.dork....
men folk...smile in your pictures. you look pretty when you smile and we want to know if you have fucked up teeth before we meet you in person. and don't post pics with babes. i don't care if she is your sister. i don't know that. she looks like an ex girlfriend to me and i am trying to decide if i am as cute as her.
it is okay to tell me i am attractive in an email. in fact, if you are halfway decent looking, it kinda makes my day.
on the other hand, do not send me the same email 3 times over a three week period. it exposes you as the unoriginal douche bag you are.
it makes me feel shallow. i am sure that some of these guys have stellar personalities, but i just KNOW i would not be attracted to them. ever. and is it more cruel to send a prewritten message saying you are not interested or just not respond at all?
etiquette is not my thing in real life (all though i do put on a great act in a fancy situation). and internet dating etiquette...well...i have no clue and i really don't care.
i am pushy. i am blunt. i cuss. there.
i am constantly on the look our for fellow date.dorkers in the real life. what do you say when you see someone that you have looked at their profile on the web and then they are standing in front of you? i mean...you all ready thought about talking to them through the computer, but now that they are right in front of you will you have the balls to say anything? luckily i have not had this problem. i have found my neighbor on there and i see him in real life and one guy that works in my building. wasn't interested online and certainly am not now (read: tapered legged jeans).
date.dork has asked me to throw a lot of the qualities i usually look for in people out the window. there are very few people that are "my type" on there. but obviously "my type" doesn't work for me or i wouldn't be trolling for dudes on the computer.
i hate that it tells me i have 7 new emails, when there really aren't any.
i hate the IM function.
and i hate trying to write an email to a stranger to make them want to hang out with me.
i am so much better in real life. but if i just email people asking them out they think i am being too pushy.

jesus. i just want someone who is taller than me, smarter than me, more attractive than me, who doesn't have a big ego, likes music, wine, books, coffee and wants to sit at home as much as he wants to go shake it. or watch me shake it. or just let me shake it.

i want to shake it soon!

ah fuck. i am way off topic now...

3 comments:

Dahnks said...

I want to shake it again soon also.

Sarah said...

ok, we all know that interweb dating can be kind of odd, BUT you have to admit that it is very entertaining???? And has very good chances of getting you laid... sorry brad.

Erin is Fabulous said...

hehehe. taller, smarter, more attractive, AND likes to stay in and go out? jeeze woman! it's amazing you ever found anyone to date!

just kidding. i heart you mucho.

love, your memi