unwelcome house guest

when i got up this morning i was a little surprised to find my neighbor's cat on my balcony. this was a fairly common occurrence last fall. there is a hole in the exterior wall of the building that i assume is where the old balcony support used to be. apparently when they built the new balconies they found it unnecessary (aka they are lazy) to fill in that hole. that is going to have to be fixed. the cat that lives in the apartment below me makes it's way up to my balcony by jumping from the rail of the balcony below, into said hole and up onto my balcony. this always happens when my neighbor is not home. i was running late for zumba so i didn't have a chance to see if she was home before i left, so when i came home i took the cat downstairs to return it and- shocking-she was not home. i brought the cat back up and put it back on my balcony and put a post it on her door. bacon and clementine are not too found of the visitor on the porch. bacon just seems pissed that she missed her chance for outside sunning. clementine, on the other hand, made it her business to hiss, growl and bat at the unwelcome visitor through the screen. the cat wandered around on the porch and walked on the rail. this made me extremely nervous as i live on the fourth floor. i gave the cat water since i have no clue at what point last night or this morning it made it's way up here. that seemed to appease it for a while and then it started to cry. it is nice outside, but fairly windy and it wanted in. that was not an option. i thought maybe it was hungry. i debated (as i have before in this situation) as to whether or not i should give it food, because i don't want to reinforce this habit. at the same time i feel bad for the lil guy. so as i went into the kitchen to get food the cat jumped from the balcony onto the small stone ledge of my kitchen window. it is a pretty decent sized leap. shit. now what? it is not possible to remove the screen without popping it out, which would knock the cat off the ledge. so bronson and i decide to use the backboard we painted as a bridge for the cat. as i am getting the board out the cat nearly falls off the window. a feline fatality would have really put a damper on this lovely day. so eventually we get the cat to walk up the board and get it back on my deck. we popped the screen out in case it happened again, which it did shortly after. for the sake of my own sanity this poor cat is now locked in my bathroom, with clementine on the other side of the door hissing and growling. this is not my ideal saturday. nor am i excited about the prospect of cleaning up piss and shit from an animal that does not belong to me.
when will this woman get home?
when will she realize that she shouldn't let the cat out on the balcony when she isn't home?
and what the hell am i going to do with a random cat in my bathroom?
i thought about hoisting it down in a laundry basket, but i have no rope and would feel horrible if something happened. i can't really just chuck it back down there.
it won't stop crying. i feel so bad.
jesus. i just wanted to read and paint.


Brad said...

Just put it in your wall.

terra said...

the cat excrement?

Brad said...

No, the cat.

Sarah said...

that sounds annoying. you should probably just cook it for dinner.

Dana said...

So what ended up happening? I hope you really gave your neighbor a piece of your mind. I can't believe she thinks it's cool to let a cat on a balcony unattended.

terra said...

well...apparently this lil guy is pretty intelligent. she came home around 6, after being at work all day and was very apologetic. i guess that the escape artist cat has figured out how to open the hook and eye latch that keeps her screen doors shut. appropriate for balcony climbing, his name is romeo. i made sure i stressed the fact that he almost fell off the window ledge and that she needs to call our landlord to get this fixed. it isn't fair to rob bacon and clem of their much needed outdoor time!

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